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Resilience… What is it and How to get more of it!

Every one of us has challenges in life but the ways in which we ‘bounce back’ differ. Some people tend to bounce back rather quickly and simply; while others seem to struggle and get stuck in their pain. So what can you do to become more resilient?

After you take this quiz, read about the 5 biggest steps you can take today to bounce back quicker from the adversities in your life.

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1. Do you have a good support system? (i.e. friends, family, mentors)

2. Do you have healthy habits for dealing with stress? (such as working out, meditating, journal writing, yoga, or playing music)

3. Are you able to see the glass as ‘half full’? In other words, do you tend to find the positive aspect of negative experiences?

4. Do you have effective communication skills? Are you able to articulate what you are thinking or feeling clearly?

5. Do you tend to feel in control of your choices?


If you said yes to all of the above, you tend to be a resilient person! The more ‘yes’ answers you had, the more resilient you are. If, however, most or all of your answers were ‘no’s’, you have some work to do… Read on to find out how to increase your ability to adapt and bounce back.

Tip #1… Find a good support system. If you don’t feel you can talk to your friends or family, reach out to a therapist. (I am happy to help.)

Tip #2… Look back over your life and notice when you were most relaxed. What were you doing? What brings you a sense of calm and peace? Whatever the answer is… DO A LOT OF THAT! (Assuming it is healthy…this in not to recommend you overeat all day if it relaxes you but instead to find music, art, walking, bird watching, anything healthy and positive!) Also too, if you don’t feel like you have had something positive to look back to, start something new.

Tip #3… Your perception is a big part of why you feel the way you do. Ask yourself if there may be another way to view a situation. Ask yourself how someone with a more positive attitude would view the same situation (the challenge you are struggling with).

Tip #4…Let people know what you are thinking and feeling. When we hold in our feelings, we get angry and depressed. When we release them, even if there is no immediate resolution, we tend to feel better; thus, helping us to ‘bounce back’ more quickly.

Tip #5… Remind yourself that YOU are in control of your response. While we can’t control that which happens around us, we can always control our response.

Good luck and remember that life will always throw adversaries at us; it is up to us as to how we respond.

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